The Comeback

Well, well, well... Looks who's decided to grace this blog with her presence... Stephanie.  To what do we owe the honor?

Look, blog I'm sorry.  I've been really busy.

A likely excuse.  And a common lie for you, isn't it?

Ok, I haven't been that busy.  But I haven't been that interesting either.

Feeling sorry for yourself again?

What? No!

C'mon...

Ok, maybe a little.  But you know, the winter and all that.  It was freezing here-- even for Canada!  And so I haven't been getting out there and trying new things.  And I spend all my time at work, on work.  You know how the fall and winter are.

Why don't you try making a schedule.  That works for other bloggers.  And then people would get your witty repartee again.  If anyone still reads this, that is.

Now, now blog, let's not get nasty...

I'm sorry.  I've been feeling neglected.  You have that other blog that you write on...

I do, but that's for work.  You know that.  You said you wouldn't mind.

I don't, I guess.  But back to that schedule thing...

You are right, I will start a schedule, and make sure I post something, even if I think its innocuous and silly.

Those are the best posts.

Um, thanks?  Anyways, I will post on weekends.  Is that ok?

Its a start.  And better then nothing.

Than.  Better than nothing.

Listen, you better wrap this up, you're starting to correct your own grammar.

Ok.  Well, see you either tomorrow or next weekend.  With something to talk about.  Goodnight.

Night.

Funny Friday: Hugs are free.

I like to draw stuff.  Most of the time, its stuff I think is hilarious.  All of this stuff I draw in a sketch book I have titled, "The Happy Book."  I know, original.  But these are things I thought I would share with you on Fridays.  And lo, they shall be called the "Funny Friday Collection."  I hope you bust a gut like I did-- and do when I show them to people.  Enjoy.  And I'm sorry.

Just like the shark said.  They're free.

In case you were looking for one too...

I asked a similarly big-boobed friend of mine: "Where can I get a strapless bra that doesn't suck?"

She replied, "Narnia."

Which sucks for me because I don't have my car today. To which she said, "you don't need a car, you need a wardrobe."

She is right on that count in so many ways.

It comes once a year...

My birthday is here!  This year I'm not making a big deal about it.  I'm going to do some stuff with my family today, and dinner with friends tomorrow.  You know how it is.  Everywhere I went today, I told people that it was mu birthday!  I learned something new-- once you hit 30 years old, people don't really care that much about your birthday.  Ah well, they're just mad 'cause its not their birthday.  Happy Birthday to me!

What I wore: Antique Roadtrip Edition

Wow; nice of you to show up.  Where have you been, Stephanie?

Well blog, I have been on vacation.

And before that?  Its been like a month.

Well... I'm a teacher and it gets a little busy at work in June.  I was doing that J-O-B thing to pay the bills.  

And you could drop me a line?  Say hello?

I guess I could have; but I wasn't very interesting for the past little while.  Just working.  You know.

Well, don't let it happen again.

Ok.  Maybe.  I don't know.  I will try, how's that?

Next time just give some warning.  Ok?

Yep.  You got it.   

So what I'm trying to say is, I'm sorry for the radio silence, y'all.  Life got busy, and then I went on vacation (more on that later.)  But I'm back, and its summer, so its time to resume the "lots-of-posts- cause-I-got-nothing-else-going-on" season! So let's kick this off with a post about clothes.

::Top to Bottom::

Scarf: Olive's Oddments

Jacket: WalMart

T-Shirt: Cotton Ginny (remember that place?)

Jeans: Torrid

Shoes: Birenstock (I know, another pair!  That's like 5 now.)

Bag: Fossil (on sale, from Macy's!)

Don't I look bad-ass?  My mother hates it when I wear skulls.  She thinks its so morbid.  I think its tough you know?  I gotta keep up appearances with my tattoos, and nose ring (both of which she hates, both of which I got to tick her off.)  Ah, moms and daughters, huh? 

AND, I found a new hair product I love.  So I wear my hair out and afro-y more.

AND AND, I got that awesome purse while shopping with my mom in Buffalo-- for almost 200 dollars off!

I wore this to one of my favorite places, Aberfoyle Antique Market!  We didn't buy anything that day, but I was tempted a few times.  Here is the items that I wanted the most, but I couldn't quite convince D to let me get it:

 

Isn't it so... awesome?  D said it was tacky, but I thought it would look so classy in the living room! Oh well, hopefully its there next time.  So I can buy it once and for all!

Stress...

Pic link

...and that's how I feel about that.

Mayra over at Ponder Wonders has her Soul Food Link-Up every Monday.  If you have a cute or clever graphic that is inspirational, (or like mine, funny while making you think) you should go on over and link on up. 

80's Music Anger Management

I love Songza.  Love it.  I can choose what I want to hear and it plays it.

I am a little afraid that it can read my mind though.  Tonight, I wanted to hear some 80s music, and so I chose (duh) an 80s music playlist.  The playlist is called "80's Music Anger Management."

Here's the thing:  every song that has played is awesome.  EVERY. SINGLE. SONG. IS. AWESOME. 

Here's what has come on so far (links go to the You Tube Videos):

• Radio Ga Ga by Queen
• Working for the Weekend by Loverboy
• Video Killed the Radio Star by The Buggles
• Working in a Coal Mine by Devo
• Girls Just Want to Have Fun by Cyndi Lauper
• Shout by Tears for Fears
• Kids in America by Kim Wilde
• Our House by Madness
• Once in a Lifetime by The Talking Heads
• Tenderness by General Public
• A Little Respect by Erasure

Awesome, right?

Now "Walk like an Egyptian" is on, so you know what I'm going to do...

Apocalypse Now: Snowmageddon 2013

Looka all that snow/ Not that much at first/ Walking is becoming a chore
Visibility is not that great/ It does look pretty though/ Futility, thy name is shovel
Up to the tops of my boots now/ What one wears for Snowmageddon/ Thank goodness, coffee!

I have a strange fixation with the apocalypse. 

Whenever people tell me about some HUGE event that will probably make traveling and stuff a little less convenient, I like to give it an inappropriate title.  When they closed the Gardiner Expressway in Toronto down to fix it, people were worried that they wouldn't be able to get anywhere in the city, since that expressway was a main artery.  So I liked to refer to that weekend as "Carmageddon" because people were talking about it like it was a CATASTROPHE!

Today we had a little snow storm.  But people have been talking about it for days.  Yesterday the buzz at school was that there would be a snow day.  And lo there was.  (I shall never doubt you again Dee.)  Because people were "preparing" for this "emergency"  D and I started calling it "Snowmageddon" in our household.

Unfortunately, the frozen end-of-the-world is not enough for D to stay home for work.  So off he went in the thick of it for justice or whatever.

Me, I stayed in bed and dozed.  Texted some teacher friends congratulating them on a free day of rest, and read some of my book.  But I got wondering how bad it was outside.  So I decided to brave the storm and take some adventure photography.

Really, it wasn't that bad.  Just a lot of snow.  A lot of snow.  And a lot of bad driving.  And shovellers.

I was funny though, I took some pictures and walked around for a bit, and noticed that my fave cafe was open.  So I took a break, and waited before I went out to face the snowpocalypse again.  By the time I drank a coffee and ate a muffin, it had snowed almost 6 inches.

And I started thinking about other types of end-of-the-world scenarios.  Here's what I thought of so far:

• "A-pod-calypse": Over pollenation of ragweed and other weeds that lead to the over-active allergies of people to spread a virus that will end us all.
• "Sunmageddon": the explosion of the sun, not to be confused with  the Hotpocalypse which is extreme global warning, and the need for sunblock SPF 1 million.  Which again is different from the "Hot-Pocketalypse": which is extinction by eating Hot Pockets.
• "Robacalypse": The rise of the machines.  hopefully they will just create a Constitutional Robocracy instead of using us for batteries.
• "Infomageddon": The internet crashes, and we are left to our own devices.  Does anyone know how to use a dictionary anymore?  What about a card catalogue?
• "Zombegeddon": Um. Zombie apocalypse, natch.
• "Babygeddon": No more babies.  No more people.  Like in Children of Men by P.D. James.
• "Crunchmageddon": the opposite of the Big Bang.

Besides being a strange young person, why do you think about these things, Stephanie?

I'm glad you asked that, voice in my head.  I have two theories:

First:   Every time I read the news, or watch something on TV, I'm confronted by news of things that will or should have killed me.  Its tiresome.  I refuse to be scared of possibilities.  So I give them funny names.  My brain tumor scare was "Cancergeddon."  Its how I deal with the fear of the unknown.  I guess.


Second:  I really do think that how we think about our end, can help us to be better people, thereby avoiding that ending.  Its why I like to read apocalyptic novels.  It is interesting to think of how writer see humanity.  Will we come together and help each other out?  Create a new utopian society?  Or will we become even more violent, and competitive and try to eat each other?  it is a great philosophical question.  Much more thought-provoking than knowing what someone thinks about a glass of water. So, are people inherently good, or bad?


I'll leave you with that question.  I'm off to count our canned goods.

Ongoing Battles Of Will: Phrasing Feud

D and I were talking. He says I use too many "big" words.  I think I use just enough.  I like words, they are fun.  Here's part of the convo:

D: How did you know...?

Me: You know, I can extrapolate data from incomplete sources. 

D: You mean you can figure stuff out.  Why do you talk like that?

Me: I dunno.  'Cause I'm smart?  Because I want to express myself clearly by using appropriate
       vocabulary?

D: You mean you want to be understood?

Me: That's what I said.

D: No, you used more words than you needed to.

Me: I think I used the appropriate numbers of words to convey what I was thinking.

D: You're doing it again!  You're being verbose.

Me: No, I am not. I have a large vocabulary, and I find challenging myself to use words that are
       frequently misused or forgotten, fun.

D: Okay.  You say "potato..."

Me: ...I say "subterranean, starchy, tuberous, crop."

6 Lessons I Learned from 80s Television

Hey, remember my awesome post about Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure?  Well, here's more 80s nonsense:

6 Lessons I Learned from 80s television:

1.  No matter how bad it got, the plucky orphans will be okay.

If there is one thing that Punky Brewster, Webster, Arnold and Willis from Diffr’ent Strokes  taught me, it’s that cute, sassy orphans will get the family they need, and change the lives of their adopted families for the better.  This was comforting to me.  Throughout my childhood,  I spent my time being plucky and spirited just in case... Not that I ever wanted to be an orphan, I was just covering my bases.  

2. There doesn’t always need to be a boss.

Who was the boss?  Was it Angela?  Or Tony?  Maybe it was man-crazy Mona? No one ever knew.  You know why, because the boss wasn’t on the show.  It was all of us watching.  The boss was in our hearts. 

3. If something goes wrong, just go back in time and fix it.

Quantum Leap and Sliders knew how to change history.  Forget these new movies like The Butterfly Effect, those nerds are over-thinking it.  What could go wrong? Just go and fix the error.  Don’t re-write the whole story, just edit.  Everything will be fine.  Why do you worry so much?

4. Mom and Dad can fix your problems in 22 minutes.  

Sure you’ll spend 16 minutes trying to get yourself out of trouble, but in the end you will have to tell them.  And in 5 minutes, your parents will be able to undo your mistake and the outcome of your crazy half-cocked plan to get out of trouble.   They will leave enough time to tell you they love you, and that they hope you’ve learned from your mistake.  Of course you have.  Hug it out.

5. There is such thing as “Justifiable Braticide.”

The Cosby Show taught me that parents were allowed to kill their bratty children.  Cliff Huxtable told Theo, “I brought you into this world, and I can take you out.”

What a comforting thought for a child.

6. There were no rules for nicknames; it was wide open.

On Growing Pains, Mike Seaver's best friend was "Boner."  On The Cosby Show, Theo's best friend, "Cockroach." Yep.

What I learned from the 80s: Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure

I was watching one of my favorite movies, Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure, and I was thinking about how this movie helped shaped my philosophy about people.  Really.

Hear me out.

The most memorable quote from this movie is "Be excellent to each other, and party on."  Those guys were actually geniues!  This quote teaches the simple and timeless tenet of being nice to other people, just for the sake of being nice.  No reason, no rewards.  And it turns out, that life is easier, if you are nice to people, and they are nice back.  How awesome would that world be?

The next piece of wisdom in this quote is this, love yourself, and enjoy your life.  Embrace joy, have fun, sometime people forget how to have fun.  Instead, you should "party on."

If we are going to be totally honest, this movie was the reason I became so interested in history, and ultimately why I majored in history in college.  This film is full of little life lessons! For example:

• Know what and who came before you.  They were here leading up to the moment you were born.  You are a piece of history!  Isn't that empowering?
• On the other hand, we don't really know what happened in history.  We know what was written down, and what some people hypothesized.  Without a time machine, it is impossible to know what went on back then.  Think about if some historical figures were transported to today; they might very well run amok.  
• With that, we probably shouldn't base our decisions or life around the perceptions of decisions and lives of historical people.  We should make our own choices, and mistakes.  That way we are responsible for our own victories!
• George Carlin was awesome.
• Always help out a friend in need, whether it is moving, or rescuing a band member from potentially attending military school by trekking through history to collect famous people so that you can pass a high school exam, and save a future civilization.  That's what friends are for.

I don't think I'm reading too much into this movie at all.  I think people underestimate the nuances, and philosophies present in the film.   Movies can be funny and educational.  

Are there any films that people tease you for loving?  D teases me about my love for Bill and Ted all. the. time.  But I don't care, its totally an important movie.  And part of my life apparently.

But to be clear, I didn't like the sequels.  They were stupid.

Have you ever...

...seen my hot-water bottle cozy? His name is Wator, Protector of the Hot Water Bottle.

I made him when I just starting learning how to knit.  It was a challenging first project, but I think I did quite well.   I made him out of dollar store yarn and some vintage buttons I had.  His teeth were felt, and he's removable.

I used him today because I hurt my back, and I needed some warmth.  Wator always scares away the pain.

Have you ever...

...seen my car air freshener?  Its one of my favorite things.  It smells like cookies.

I have a weakness for silly things.  Every time I get into my car, I smile.  I bet Mandela would smell good.  He would smell like freedom.  I'm sure freedom smells like cookies.  Or cinnamon rolls.